He's been told to expect more bad days than good for the first little while. It's still a reprieve, no matter how off-kilter the day to trauma episode ratio manages to swing. But, it's going on 13 months and things have been good. Bucky really feels he's making progress until Shuri requests him back at Mount Bashenga.
Removing HYDRA's program was proving to be a bit more difficult and after some stress tests, that progress was knocked back several steps leaving Bucky feeling angry and erratic and unstable. Enough that they had to subdue him and put him in a room and let the episode lose its momentum naturally; he had the tools necessary to do that but he had to take control of his own mind for them to work.
Only it was looking as if he couldn't get through it on his own.
Shuri considers who to call, knowing that someone will need to pull him out and after some thought and realizing Steve Rogers was too far in hiding to be able to help, she remembers someone else who helped the soldier more than she likely expected.
When Daisy hears that Bucky Barnes needs her help, she drops everything to go to him. Literally. Her tablet with a handful of half-written SHIELD reports had been haphazardly discarded as she hurried to leave the little apartment she'd been staying in while finishing her recovery.
Worry ate at her the entire way to Mount Bashenga, even minute feeling like an hour. The handful of conversations she's had with Bucky during her time in Wakanda have endeared the man even further to her, opening something in her heart she'd worried was closed off forever. After everything he's been through, the broken hero deserves nothing but a little peace in which to get his bearings, but goddamn HYDRA keeps rearing another head to attack him, even if it's just in his mind. She knows better than anyone how that can be the most dangerous battleground.
She doesn't hesitate to inform Shuri that she's going into that room; there's no consideration whatsoever of there even being other options. Bucky's in there, so she's going in too. And she can handle whatever he throws at her because that's what he needs right now.
Without his arm, he poses no real physical threat to anyone and that was very much something Bucky wanted in place as soon as they took him out of were still there, even if the words that activated the Winter Soldier weren't. Now after over a year, he's not sure he'll ever be rid of HYDRA.
Shuri leads Daisy towards a door and when she opens it she listens, then lets out a sound of relief as she nods vaguely in the direction of where the agent will find him. "Just be careful, Agent Johnson. I would not have called you had I felt you could not help him out of this. But I cannot be sure who you will get in there."
An agonizing cry bellows down the hall, one that seems to convey his pain in an almost palpable way. It's only when Daisy sees him that she might understand how horribly stuck he had to feel to be pressed into a corner of the room, a bloody hand holding the side of his head while fingers tangle in dark hair; his face twisted and contorted in silent suffering.
The closer Daisy gets, she will hear him mumbling over and over as his breathing becomes more laboured and irregular.
"Just get out of my head.. get out of my head... get out of my head... I need to get out of my head..."
Shuri's warning is noted with a nod but Daisy still moves inside without a second thought. Even when she hears that cry, it only serves to make her walk faster, adrenaline racing through her. It kills her to hear him like that, remembering all too well her own struggles, and seeing him...
Seeing him breaks something in her that might never be repaired. It's one thing to know what HYDRA had done to him — seeing the way those monsters still affect him makes her wish she could kill Gideon Malick all over again. Him and all the others who had ever played a part in doing this to an innocent man.
When she's close enough to feel his heart beating in his chest, she stills, both hands held out and open at her sides. Keeping her expression calm and even takes every bit of her training. She pitches her voice low, careful, approaching him the way you would a wounded animal since she can't know which way his instincts will fall.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
- need a place to hide, but I can't find one near
Removing HYDRA's program was proving to be a bit more difficult and after some stress tests, that progress was knocked back several steps leaving Bucky feeling angry and erratic and unstable. Enough that they had to subdue him and put him in a room and let the episode lose its momentum naturally; he had the tools necessary to do that but he had to take control of his own mind for them to work.
Only it was looking as if he couldn't get through it on his own.
Shuri considers who to call, knowing that someone will need to pull him out and after some thought and realizing Steve Rogers was too far in hiding to be able to help, she remembers someone else who helped the soldier more than she likely expected.
So, she calls Daisy Johnson.
no subject
Worry ate at her the entire way to Mount Bashenga, even minute feeling like an hour. The handful of conversations she's had with Bucky during her time in Wakanda have endeared the man even further to her, opening something in her heart she'd worried was closed off forever. After everything he's been through, the broken hero deserves nothing but a little peace in which to get his bearings, but goddamn HYDRA keeps rearing another head to attack him, even if it's just in his mind. She knows better than anyone how that can be the most dangerous battleground.
She doesn't hesitate to inform Shuri that she's going into that room; there's no consideration whatsoever of there even being other options. Bucky's in there, so she's going in too. And she can handle whatever he throws at her because that's what he needs right now.
no subject
Shuri leads Daisy towards a door and when she opens it she listens, then lets out a sound of relief as she nods vaguely in the direction of where the agent will find him. "Just be careful, Agent Johnson. I would not have called you had I felt you could not help him out of this. But I cannot be sure who you will get in there."
An agonizing cry bellows down the hall, one that seems to convey his pain in an almost palpable way. It's only when Daisy sees him that she might understand how horribly stuck he had to feel to be pressed into a corner of the room, a bloody hand holding the side of his head while fingers tangle in dark hair; his face twisted and contorted in silent suffering.
The closer Daisy gets, she will hear him mumbling over and over as his breathing becomes more laboured and irregular.
"Just get out of my head.. get out of my head... get out of my head... I need to get out of my head..."
no subject
Seeing him breaks something in her that might never be repaired. It's one thing to know what HYDRA had done to him — seeing the way those monsters still affect him makes her wish she could kill Gideon Malick all over again. Him and all the others who had ever played a part in doing this to an innocent man.
When she's close enough to feel his heart beating in his chest, she stills, both hands held out and open at her sides. Keeping her expression calm and even takes every bit of her training. She pitches her voice low, careful, approaching him the way you would a wounded animal since she can't know which way his instincts will fall.
"Bucky? Bucky, it's Daisy, can you hear me?"