[ But that's the thing; he's not completely sure that what he's saying is the right thing to say. Sure, he's stopped letting his head get in the way and started saying what comes to mind first, but is that really the best way of handling things? He wonders sometimes.
Still, he reasons that wondering might shake the foundation that he's become for her. That realization isn't enough to plant seeds of doubt, but it is enough to make him realize that he can't let his head run away from him. Then the doubts will creep in like weeds among flowers, and then the strange kind of house of cards they're building might come crashing down.
And oddly enough, the fact that he's seen things that have threatened his calm and almost have sent him off screaming is partly what enables him to stay by her side, trying his best to be as rock-solid as he can. He navigated those storms, but only barely, and as she's seen, memories still cling to him too stubbornly to cut loose. If he can be a support to her in a way that he never had himself, then that makes everything worthwhile.
In his experience, a load is easier to carry when it's shared between two. ]
But you won't worry about yourself, will you? [ He hopes that question isn't too pointed, that it gets her to shut down. It's just something he's observed about her, how she worries over everyone else first and herself last, if she does at all.
When her hand touches his cheek and her fingers twine into his hair, he smiles. He likes it when she reaches out, because it feels like it's been a long time since anyone made contact with him the way she is right now.
And then, as if he can see the turns her mind is taking, he reaches out for her too, intending to take her free hand in his so he can give it a squeeze. ]
Hey, you said it just then: the universe conspired to bring us together, so I know it's not going to pull us apart just like that. [ He knows how strong she is, that she doesn't need his worry or his concern, but he can't keep the concern out of his eyes even as he looks intently at her. ]
I have no plans to- [ His breath hitches then, as if some part of him is having a hard time talking about this, but he pushes through it, because he has to say this. ] I have no plans to die on you, Daisy.
[ He lets go of her hand so that he can lightly brush away the tears he sees forming. ] I would have, if you hadn't swept in and saved me, so I'm not about to waste that now. [ He leans in a bit, almost as if he wants to kiss her, but he refrains, saying instead: ] I mean that. I'm not going anywhere, not if I have anything to say about it.
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Still, he reasons that wondering might shake the foundation that he's become for her. That realization isn't enough to plant seeds of doubt, but it is enough to make him realize that he can't let his head run away from him. Then the doubts will creep in like weeds among flowers, and then the strange kind of house of cards they're building might come crashing down.
And oddly enough, the fact that he's seen things that have threatened his calm and almost have sent him off screaming is partly what enables him to stay by her side, trying his best to be as rock-solid as he can. He navigated those storms, but only barely, and as she's seen, memories still cling to him too stubbornly to cut loose. If he can be a support to her in a way that he never had himself, then that makes everything worthwhile.
In his experience, a load is easier to carry when it's shared between two. ]
But you won't worry about yourself, will you? [ He hopes that question isn't too pointed, that it gets her to shut down. It's just something he's observed about her, how she worries over everyone else first and herself last, if she does at all.
When her hand touches his cheek and her fingers twine into his hair, he smiles. He likes it when she reaches out, because it feels like it's been a long time since anyone made contact with him the way she is right now.
And then, as if he can see the turns her mind is taking, he reaches out for her too, intending to take her free hand in his so he can give it a squeeze. ]
Hey, you said it just then: the universe conspired to bring us together, so I know it's not going to pull us apart just like that. [ He knows how strong she is, that she doesn't need his worry or his concern, but he can't keep the concern out of his eyes even as he looks intently at her. ]
I have no plans to- [ His breath hitches then, as if some part of him is having a hard time talking about this, but he pushes through it, because he has to say this. ] I have no plans to die on you, Daisy.
[ He lets go of her hand so that he can lightly brush away the tears he sees forming. ] I would have, if you hadn't swept in and saved me, so I'm not about to waste that now. [ He leans in a bit, almost as if he wants to kiss her, but he refrains, saying instead: ] I mean that. I'm not going anywhere, not if I have anything to say about it.